Like totally different. As if I was blind before this moment and I am only seeing for the first time!! (oh jeeze, I sound like a Twilight novel now…lets try that again!)
It’s as if I have SEEN the light…err too Martin Luther?? mmmk What I am trying to say is… I have kicked the ass of this poopy feeling down, sad most of the time feeling FINALLY!! Well, to be honest it’s been a few weeks but I have been so busy catching up on life that I couldn’t sit still long enough to write! OH the things I have missed! Like sleep! real good quality-don’t want to get up in the morning because my bed is so frigging awesome sleep! And laughing just to laugh! I can actually sit with my friends and find humour in little things again (perhaps inappropriate things but whatever, don’t judge me!!) My appetite is back (maybe my clothes with start to fit again soon???) OH my and ENERGY has returned! I have been able to go to the gym 5 days a week and I actually want to walk the doggies everyday; it’s no longer a chore!
I am actually, for the first time in many years, excited for Christmas time! I am looking forward to the shopping, cooking, baking, gift wrapping, rather than dreading it like usual. I even don’t completely HATE the idea of attending 15 parades with the kids baton/drum core group over the next 7 weeks (I don’t like it, but I don’t hate it…that’s a start y’all!)
So really, I think I did it. And that my friends feels good to say. I, Robyn Elizabeth, all by myself, got my ass over the hump and pulled myself out of something I thought would never end. The fact that my family and my friends and my kids and my doggies were all there for me, rooting for me, giving me the little boosts I needed to do it certainly made it happen. I can never repay that kindness and love. I will never forget what you all have done for me. I may not have been very forward with my thanks at the time, but I just want you all to know you basically saved my life by just being there when I needed you most and I will be forever great full.
And honestly, knowing what all y’all know about me now, the fact that you are STILL here is pretty fucking fantastic. Either that or you are all actually insane and/or imaginary and my life is in fact a Johnny Depp movie directed by M Night Shyamalan (which would be totally awesome!!)?? hmmm…
xoxo me!! ❤